I am writing this down, so that I can look back and see how silly I am. I have accepted this as fact, but just need to write down what I am feeling, then get over it :)
Tomorrow Ethan and Brielle start going to Daycare. That is such a bad word to me and I tear up even thinking about it. I have this fear that while I am working my 8-9 hour day, and Travis is working his 10-11 hour day, that something will happen to them, and I won't be able to be there for them when they need me. I get flashbacks of all the times I have watched the news about children leaving school, never to be seen again. I know that is a little dramatic, but that is probably my biggest fear. I just hope that my kids can forgive me for not being home for them. I really try to make the time that I do have with them count, and I hope those are the times that they remember.
I am trying to stay positive, and to just keep thinking this is temporary, until Travis can get settled in his new career. So note to self....you will look back on this time and think how ridiculous you were to even have these thoughts in your head. This is a great experience for them to meet new friends and learn new things. And Ethan is very excited to get to ride a bus to school!
9 years ago
4 comments:
I'm sorry Kristin. Somedays I wish my kids went to daycare and wonder if they would even be better off there :) I'm sure Ethan and Brie are having fun and doing fine!
I hope you don't look back and think your feelings were ridiculous, but instead look back (when the time comes) and just be so glad those days are over!
The most important thing is that you DO want what is best for your kids and Heavenly Father KNOWS that. Even though the situation is not perfect, it is the best in your circumstances, and so it will all be OK in the end. Hang in there. It is not forever, but your kids are.
I understand your fears dear Kristin and I wish I could quit my job and come be your personal babysitter. Your kids love you and they know that you love them! Luckily they are too young to understand. I took care of many kids who were dropped off at daycare at 5:00 a.m. and not picked up until closing time at 6:30 p.m. For those kids, the parents just didn't want to be with them! You, on the other hand are doing everything you can for your kiddos and truly love them! Hang in there and remember that it is not forever! This too shall pass!
I'm sorry Kristin. I would be the same way. I cried when I left Kenzie for the first time and I was leaving her with my sister less than a mile from my work so she was right around the corner. It's tough. Don't worry, it is only temporary. Don't worry! I wish my saying that really would make the worry go away.
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